You is kind.

You is smart.

You is  important.

– Aibilene Clark, THE HELP

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Reuters

Of course we all know we have more than one soul mate and they all serve purposes in life so it’s no surprise Eva Longoria, the 37-year-old former Desperate Housewives actress, believes this as well.  Not only does she believe in more than one soul mate for her, she also believes that not all of them have to be  romantic.  So true!

Eva split from ex-husband Tony Parker in  November 2010.  Even though things did not “work out” for them, there was a real reason why the two hooked up.  A learning lesson that only Eva and Tony would understand – if they have gotten to that point in their lives when they could look back and say,  “Oh, okay, that’s why we hooked up and this is what we learned from it and this was one of those “steps” toward happiness and total life fulfillment.”

Eva has gotten her act together when I hear her say, “I think that your friends are your soul mates, too, and family members.”

Here’s a big thumbs up for you, Eva, because you finally understand what soul mates are all about.

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My kids’ daddy is in the hospital.  In ICU.  And every day I wake up since he’s been in there and there’s no word, it’s a good thing.  He was complaining of stomach problems.  Excruciating stomach problems.  He and I aren’t together anymore and we live separately.  He had called my daughter saying his stomach hurt.  She went over there and thought it was the flu.  He thought it was the flu.  The next morning, he called again and this time he could barely catch his breath.  “Dad, we’re going.”  So she took him down to the emergency room and they set him up in a room and started taking tests.  As it turned out, he had diverticulitis and they had to take part of his colon out.

If you knew the man like I do, he’s always in denial.  To delay things, he told the doctor that he wanted to wait until the next morning which was Saturday, 4 days ago, for his son to come up there to see him first just in case he didn’t make it.  As it turned out, but delaying it his condition worsened.  My son and daughter made it up there in time but the news was shattering.  He had feces in his stomach.  If I have my facts straight, it was coming out of the hole in his colon.

That night I went with both of them to ICU.  The surgery lasted about 6 hours.  It may have been less but they had to keep him in the operating room for longer than expected.  As it turned out they only had to take a little off his colon, not as much as we thought they would.

When they wheeled him into ICU, we were sitting there in the waiting room.  The kids rushed by his side and all he could say was, “I feel like shit!”  Everyone laughed.  That was the first obstacle we had to pass – making sure he came out of surgery okay.

While in ICU (he’s still there), he developed pneumonia.  I cried all day yesterday when we found out.

The story is he’s a heavy smoker and drank and didn’t take care of himself.  He had been smoking since 7th grade.  He had a drinking problem but I think it got better over the years but regardless he still drank a few beers at night.  It was really the smoking that had everyone concerned because now he had no oxygen.  They have to keep giving him oxygen.  Because he couldn’t cough up anything because it hurt to do so, he developed pneumonia.

So we get up this morning and there’s no call and I thank the good Lord up above – he’s listening.

I’ll keep you updated.

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In a perfect world, Addison Kleinhans and Bella Hicks never would have met. But the world isn’t perfect, and sometimes cancer changes young lives in a way that is hard to imagine. And sometimes, even in tragic circumstances, strangers become soul mates.

Read their story here.

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Today’s question comes from a distressed young lady from Louisiana.  It’s really sad when two people can’t be together, yet one or both of them are still longing for each other.  Is it the twin flame relationship?

“Dear Dorothy,

There is this guy that I’ve known for 8 yrs but we’ve dated for 6 out of those 8yrs. He was my first love, my first sexual partner, and my first heart-break, I’ve dated a few before him and a couple after him and so did he but for some strange and odd reason we always seem to reconnect back to each other. I was the first and last girl he dated that had respect for his parents, self respect for myself,morals,ambition, and many more positive traits. We connected as friends first and then things grew into a loving relationship but being that my family got involved and did everything in their powers to keep and tear us apart until finally that breaking point came and we had no choice but to split.. But having that so close and strong connection we manage to once again link up only this time he was involved with another female. Of course every female he would date would always dislike me because his family and he always shared that they could never be like me. He said that he only experience real love with me and that he wished my parents would never have pushed him away because he really was in deep love with me and so was I.. So 2yrs have went by we had lost communication but as I said before we always manage to reconnect but this time he is married to a woman that forced him to do it he’s already talking about a divorce because they have major issues he says he cant sleep at night and neither can I since we split. He says he wants to be back with me and I feel the same. I never felt real love with no other man but him I tried my best to move on and shake and get past him but I cant and I was told that the reason why I feel so strongly towards him the way I do is because he is most definitely my SOUL MATE WE ARE LIKE TWIN FLAMES AND THAT HE IS THE ONE FOR ME AND I STRONGLY BELIEVE IT IS TRUE SO MY QUESTION TO YOU IS DO YOU HAVE ANY ADVICE FOR ME ON MY SITUATION??? AND DO YOU THINK THAT THIS GUY REALLY COULD BE MY SOUL MATE??????

INFATUATED WITH LOVE”

Hi Infatuated,

No matter what happens in our life, we are always going to have a special place in our heart for our “first.”  I remember my first and although I would never have him back like it was back in the day, I still think fondly of him.  I don’t think anyone would disagree with that.  What we need to decide here is whether or not he is indeed your twin flame.  Twin flames, or twin souls, do tend to reunite at the darndest times and it’s nine times out of ten the wrong time.  Why that is is baffling.  What I think is that while it was horrible to the both of you at the time but your parents stepped in and put an end to the relationship for a reason and that reason could have something to do with unfinished business you two had before you could reunite again.  Of course, your parents would not know that but the law of the universe has a way of stepping in.  Can you look back and try to figure out why it was they didn’t want the two of you together because that I believe will hold the key to why you aren’t together at this time.   Since he married this other girl (which is where his life’s journey was supposed to go), it’s a whole different ballgame.  What you need to do is try to move on as hard as that sounds to do.  It’s obvious both of you have more lessons to learn before you two can be together.  In order to reunite with him, if that’s in yours and his life’s plan, something has to change.  A relationship with someone who is already married for whatever reason won’t last.  He will be torn between you and his wife and there will be problems.  If his life’s journey is to leave his wife, how certain are you that you haven’t found the soul mates who are supposed to come into your life when that happens?  Both of you have got to come from a baggage-free background.  Until both of you are ready, it’s not going to happen.  Think back on your relationship and try to figure out why it was he came into your life in the first place and then you’ll understand what the next step will be.

If you have a soul mate relationship question, email Dorothy at thewriterslife(at)gmail.com. Thank you and I look forward to having your question featured at The Soul Mate Triangle!

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If it wasn’t enough to have January being one of the coldest, if not dreariest, months of the year, they had to go and dub it the month more couples break up than any other month of the year.

Six out of ten couples will break up this month. Sounds awful, doesn’t it?

I never cared much for January anyway. After-Christmas bills are piling in, it’s too cold to enjoy most outdoor sports (or the ones I like anyway), and everything looks so bare and dreary. No wonder this is the month for the most breakups.

But, other than that, why is it that January beats out the others?

Here’s my educated guess. Valentine’s Day is right around the corner.

Something clicks in people’s heads that if they plan on getting out, they better do it now before it’s too late. When Valentine’s Day hits, they surely want to be with someone they love, or they don’t want to break their once-loved one’s heart on the most romantic day of the year so they do it now.

Another reason why it might be that January brings forth more breakups than any other month could be that the new year signals new beginnings. It is a time when people step back and reflect on the previous year, and if there are changes to be made, this is the time to do it.

Unfortunate for some, these changes include a reevaluation of their love life.

If a relationship isn’t working, and can’t be fixed, a breakup is inevitable. The Dear John or Dear Janet letter goes out, and that’s if they even bother to tell them at all. Believe me, from what I hear, some choose to just vanish from the scene of the crime without any warning, the dirty scumbags that they are.

So, what happens if you’re the dumpee?

After you’ve mourned the loss of your relationship, turn the other cheek and try to learn what it is you were supposed to learn from the relationship. Every relationship is a learning lesson in humility, courage and stamina. Other lessons will be learned, but those are enough in itself.

If you keep in mind that every single person who comes into your life from here on out on a soul mate basis does so for a reason, it helps you to see why it is that people are there in the first place. Some are not meant to be long-term. In fact, some just come into your life to help you with a particular situation, and they are gone. More than likely, most of them left in January, according to statistics, but even though they are gone in the flesh, their spirit will linger forever.

The reason for this is that when two soul mates meet in the first place, it is one spirit calling to another. The one spirit recognizes the other spirit from a previous life perhaps, but whatever the case, there is instant recognition.

That recognition, that spiritual connection, will never go away even if the breakup ends on less than amicable terms.

This may or may not be what you want to hear, but from a professional stand-point, this is what happens.

So, if you happen to be one of the statistics this year, and you become the victim of a breakup, remember that there was a reason for the two of you to come together in the first place. Figure out what it was that you learned from it, and go on from there.

Breaking up is certainly hard to do because nothing hurts worse than the pain of the heart.

Even though it seems a callous thing on the part of your boyfriend/girlfriend, think of it as a favor. To extend a bad relationship would be detrimental to your well-being. Things would only escalate, and who knows what might happen.

There is a distinct plan for you, and this certain person was only meant to come into your life to teach you something, or you teach him, so find ways to look on this as a learning experience. You’ll come out ahead in the long run and it will only empower you for the next relationship.

And just think of how nice the next one will be because you have learned a valuable lesson that will give you more strength and power than you had before.

With each relationship, you grow stronger and more confident in what does and does not make you happy. Before long, you will find the one who is supposed to be with you on a long term basis.

Meanwhile, pick up the pieces, learn what it is you are supposed to learn from this relationship, and move on into a better life and a better world of pure, soul mate love.

© Dorothy Thompson

Relationship expert Dorothy Thompson is the editor/contributing author of ROMANCING THE SOUL and coaches those seeking answers to their soul mate questions. You can visit her website for more advice at www.soulmatetriangle.com.

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Today begins my 2 week blog tour and Romancing the Soul is being reviewed by J.W. Nicklaus at Avomnia!  What a fantastic review it is, too!

Here’s a smidgeon of the review:

“The answer is never handed to us on a silver platter; we must attentively seek it if we truly desire such wisdom. Ms. Thompson, et al., summon those who pursue such knowledge of transcendence and ask only for them to read with an open mind . . . and an open heart. Plato proposed the idea that humans are of two minds: one for thinking and reasoning, and the other for emotion and passion. Arguably the evidence presented in Romancing The Soul leans heavily in favor of the latter, yet is wrapped firmly in tensile strength of deeper intuition — the ‘you just know’ factor.”

Read it at http://avomnia.wordpress.com/2011/12/04/romancing-the-soul.  Thanks so much, Jeff!

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I’m thrilled to announce my first virtual book tour with Romancing the Book begins Monday!  Woohoo!  Although the book was published in 2004, I’m bringing it back to life by taking it on a virtual book tour Dec 5 – 16. It’s a mini tour actually with the bigger one  coming up for my newest yet-to-be-released book, The Soul Mate Triangle.  But today I’d like to talk a little about something that really touched me.  While everyone else is waiting for their tour to begin, I feel mine has already started.  J.W. Nicklaus is a wonderful online friend and also a client friend when a few years ago I sent his own book, The Light, The Dark, and Ember Between, on virtual book tour.  From there we struck up a friendship that is time tested.

Today, he blogged about his upcoming review tomorrow and his words really touched me what he had to say about soul mates.  He is a true believer in the real story, not the story people conceive soul mates to be.

Here, read this:

http://avomnia.wordpress.com/2011/12/03/a-glimpse-inside-and-ahead/

Now is that awesome or what?

He announced his blog post in a blogging group I moderate and my immediate response was:

“All I can say is wow…there are so many words that should come out of my mouth but man oh man wow.  Well that’s 4 words, lol.  I remember that email, Jeff, and I remember telling you that you could have seen what the twin soul mate relationship was all about.  Most twin souls, you can’t be with them for whatever reasons.  Most go on to be companion soul mates and some karmic but that twin soul…and I’m wondering if it’s meant to be that way?  I mean think about it..maybe they are meant to be touched but not to be kept?  Interesting subject soul mates and one I have really did some digging into..Edgar Cayce, before I even read his books I had the same philosophy, then when I read them, I went wowzers.  He knew and for some odd reason I have been blessed to know but it’s funny how many people do not know and that’s why Romancing the Soul was born.  Now this is an anthology of true soul mate stories I had collected from people all over the world who wanted to share my stories with me – there are 3 sections – karmic, companion and twin soul – and I bet if you really studied the twin soul section, Jeff, you would see how your story fit right in there.  I can’t wait to read the review!  I’m heading out of town around 9 in the morning and won’t be back until Monday night but you can believe your Aunt Minnie I’ll be telling the girls to hold up and let me turn my laptop on to read my review!  You’re a love Jeff and this means the world to me.”

In the words of the church lady, isn’t that special?

Ha.

Well tomorrow starts my mini-virtual book tour and I do hope you all will visit.  The official tour page is www.pumpupyourbook.com/2011/10/20/romancing-the-soul-virtual-book-publicity-tour-december-2011/.

See you in the blogosphere!

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